Insights on the Family: Love is spelled T-I-M-E

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities" (The Family: A Proclamation to the World). 

I have written about many of the principles listed in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, the last one is wholesome recreational activities. Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf  said, "In family relationships love is really spelled t-i-m-e, time. Taking time for each other is the key for harmony at home. We talk with, rather than about, each other. We learn from each other, and we appreciate our differences as well as our commonalities. We establish a divine bond with each other as we approach God together through family prayer, gospel study, and Sunday worship" (Of Things That Matter Most).

Brothers enjoying a story together.

As we spend time together not only doing the things that bring us closer to God, but also doing the things that bring us closer together, we will build strong families. The activities we do together vary from family to family, and the phase of life can change what we do together. When my children were really little, we enjoyed going to parks and playing with toys. We would sit and read books together and just being home seemed to be enough for them. Our family has grown out of the baby phase and we are in the middle of school and teenage phases. It is challenging trying to find wholesome recreation we can all do together and enjoy together. What it ends up coming down to is sacrifice. For all of us to enjoy time together, someone may have to sacrifice a personal want. I have seen that in the end, everyone usually is happy we spent time together.

Enjoying a walk together.

There are eight elements that I read (in Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives) that build the most meaningful experiences in people's lives:

1. We are confronting tasks that we have a chance of completing.
2. We are able to concentrate on what we are doing.
3. We have clear goals.
4. We receive immediate feedback.
5. We act with deep awareness and forget our own cares and worries.
6. The experience allows us to exercise a sense of control.
7. Our concern for self disappears, yet the sense of self becomes stronger after the experience.
8. The sense of duration of time is altered.

Making positive memories together doesn't necessarily mean having an expensive vacation, or going out and doing something sensational. Sometimes the most memorable times are the small moments in life. The times that we spend talking together, walking together, listening to each other. These are times where can enjoy each other's company without the hustle and bustle of life pushing us apart. I love the eighth element, "time is altered," because when we are truly enjoying time together, time seems to fly by.

Exploring the Solar Eclipse together.

My own family tries to find good times together that are simple and inexpensive. We like to read together, do some of our chores together (like shopping), swim together, go on drives together, take walks together, watch movies together, eat yummy treats together, and I am sure there are more. I hope that as I build up a lot of these little moments, my children will be able to look back on their childhood and have a fondness of remembering how much we love each other. I hope that as I continue to work making time for these moments, our family can be stronger.

A family that plays together stays together.