Wednesday, August 20, 2008

"Par for the Course"

I remember a few years back when I attended a baby blessing of one of my siblings (it was Christmas Day). I was very excited to be there and hear the wonderful blessing, but was very disappointed when I struggled with my toddler through the entire blessing and pretty much missed everything that was said. I also worried that the commotion had been a bother to all close by.

Feeling emotionally let down, I started to cry. I tried to hide it, but eventually those near me could tell. My Grandma was sitting closest to me and must have felt prompted to lean over and put her arm around me. In that instant I felt the strength of all her years as a mother pour over to me and reassure me that the situation was okay. She leaned over and with her wisdom of years gone by said, "It's all par for the course".

I now struggle again with disappointments with myself off and on at how I see my progression. As I was writing in my journal and thinking about how the day had not gone so well, I remembered my high school days when I thought life was more "simple". I thought how easy it was to discern between what I should and shouldn't be doing. How it was easy to be friendly to everyone. I felt happy and confident in where I was going.

Thinking of how things are now, a little more complicated with a family. I find it hard to realize what is a the best course to take in teaching my children and helping them and how I can strengthen myself along the way. My Grandma's words come back into my head, "It's all par for the course." I realize that we are just at a stretching phase right now and that if we press forward doing what we know to be right and trusting in our Father in Heaven, we will find ourselves strengthened and a better person once we have made it through our trials.

I am thankful to my Grandma for following a prompting to help me in a moment of despair. I am thankful to a loving Father in Heaven for helping me even when I feel I am not succeeding. I know what I know and I will stick to it, even when I feel down. That is: Jesus Christ is my Savior and will take my hand and lead me through my dark hours. Heavenly Father does love me as his daughter and wants me to succeed. The Holy Ghost is there to guide me. I can read and study the scriptures to find answers, and listen to the prophet.

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justinrowe said...

Thank you for that thought Maryann. I understand what you are going through. Life can be such a roller coaster. Some days, you're on cloud 9, and others you wonder how you can make it another day. I'm understanding more and more the term "Enduring to the end." To me it doesn't mean enduring perfectly to the end, it is doing your best and enjoying the good times, and surviving the bad!

Dad said...

I remember that little event. I'll read your message to grandma tonight. I'm sure she won't remember, but I'm sure she will get a chuckle out of it and the say something like, "I guess we just have to pray alot." It is about enduring to the end, but enjoying the ride, cinders and all.

ladybug143 said...

Thank you! I always get a bit of inspiration from you every time I read your blog!